don't read this

rage

so fucking careless

THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK GOD DAMNIT

OR JUST... SPEAK WITH CARE!!

god fucking damnit

i don't want to hurt him...

i have to learn more and be more caring and open my heart more...

it must always be in my mind how easily harmed he is

i want him to be happy and cherished...

you made him feel ashamed and guilty... and he tried cracking jokes to make me smile because he feels guilty about being hurt, so he passes it off as a stomachache (which he probably has ofc too) but it means he's too upset to eat...

he even quoted the simple and easy line...

i don't expect things to be simple or easy. i don't need this, i just need to be loved and to love. and i am and do.

he has a new hardship every day...


I hurt him...

i cannot forgive myself for this.

i hurt him...

HOW HORRIBLE.

I DON'T WANT TO HURT HIM...

I'M SO FUCKING ENRAGED

HOW DARE I

i just want him to be happy...

i want him to feel fucking ALIVE.

YOU CAN DO THIS ONE FUCKING THING. JUST ONE. IN YOUR ENTIRE FUCKING WASTE OF A LIFE.

JUST CHERISH HIM. DON'T FUCKING HURT HIM.

MAKE HIM BELIEVE IN MAGIC.

DON'T LET HIS HEART TURN ALL DRACULA...

JUST

in my heart, people have been sorta interchangeable for a long time.

i wanted to change that

you can zoom out and condemn everything and everyone... and from a distance everything looks the same... close up is where people differ

a bird

is not the same as

that bird that comes by my window

if i can do ONE THING OF WORTH IN MY ENTIRE LIFE, LOVE HIM.

GOD FUCKING DAMNIT

I HURT HIM...


FUCKING SICKENING

DISGUSTING

HOW WRETCHED

SO FUCKING FURIOUS

but i need to feed the cats rn so put them first over my tantrum 😂


  1. Feed cats
  2. Eat
  3. Calm the fuck down.