fiction and reality
I think most people live in fictional worlds where they are the protagonist and life works like in the movies.
Characters are not actors (maybe my wife would call these operators) though, and such creatures I think must know better (or they're just here for a short story).
I think of stories as a kind of mold that parasitizes the host, spreads spores, and obscures the senses
nerves like branches, web of mycelium growing deep into them, altering them...
most stories parasitize, anyway.
thinking about people who treat kitty's profession (sex worker) like Lumberjack™, only exists in fiction, just like you see on the roll of toilet paper (that's what they think of her, too). nobody could be an Actual sex worker with opinions and insanity and a real fucking human heart inside what's been turned into an animal's body through immense and consistent dehumanization...
fucking angry at the illusions people value so highly
(I've never been misled or conjured illusions of my own... 😌 (obviously i have))
most people are not conjurers, but enough are, and when the stories take root, grow, become strong, and begin to fruit, that's when and how the living continue to forbid the dead
i'm thinking about this wretched "i'm So Sad Boo Hoo" video i saw part of, where this guy says he hit "rock bottom"... which he says means "leaving the country or living with your mom" 🤣
[author's note: this is not what rock bottom is]
and he says it's the second act of the movie when the protagonist hits rock bottom and then act three it turns around. he knows he doesn't live in a movie but decides he wants to understand his world like it's a movie and he's the protagonist
and so he goes to therapy to "get his shit together" (brainwashing)
and i'm like fascinated? and utterly disgusted.
i think he should go fishing with xianming, or rather vice versa 🤣
ok so later in the video he talks about saying no when it hurt someone's feelings (CAUSING HARM FOR SELF GAIN) and says
- it felt good afterwards, really good, he felt proud
- he was reassured by the person he hurt, because they understood it's every man for himself
- "it was ok to do that"
this makes me so fucking disgusted, so horrifically angry.
and this man is probably More considerate than most.
i hate him.